IMY

Dearest Reader,

     I can't wait to come home. I miss a lot of little things: riding bikes in the rain, getting dressed up to get trashed, sitting in my swamp cooler house half naked smoking hookah, working for old people, walking about down town Tucson...There's a billion things I miss! I never thought I'd want to go back to Tucson and just get back to the way things were, but at the same time, I wouldn't give up my place in life for anything. I'm where I need to be, regardless of how lonely, sad, and bitchy I may get, I want and need to be here.
     Tucson will always be home, even when I'm stone clode frozen in Alaska.

Yours truly,
     Alexa

We all end up alone no matter how we've grown

Dearest Reader,

     Being in the military, I guess it shouldn't be such a shock that people will constantly be on a revolving door. They're on the continuous ciricle of coming and going, just as I am, but last week was quite the eye opener for me when 3 of my closeset friends left. They all went back home and in a few weeks, 2 will be heading out to Japan while the other gets to stay in his home town. All the while, I'm left here in the Devil's armpit. Watching them all get on a bus and drive away was heart breaking. Our last night together was spent at Chili's being obnoxioius as ever. This Friday 2 more will leave. And even so, I can't stop listening to The Sarcastic Dharma Society. Meloncholy as ever. SARC my life....

Yours Truly,
     Alexa

Hittin' the gym. Hard.

Dearest Reader,

     How is it possible? Seriously! I've gained roughly 5 lbs in 2 weeks. SRSLY. WTF. This will be the last time I "just relax" ever again. I guess I'll be on the constant move for the rest of my life. But what did I expect? I joined the AF. Typical day of tech school...0700-1700 School. 1800-1930 Gym in bed by 2200. Wake up and do it all over again, unless its PT (Physical training) days. Fall out for PT at 0410. Push ups, sit ups, and a 1.5-3 mi run And repeat. And repeat. And repeat.
     OH! This weekend, we have RMT which is short for Remedial Military Training. Basically, we go back to BMT for the weekend because last weekend, a few Airman thought it would be a really good idea to drink ON BASE underage. Real cool, guys. One of them drank themselves to the point where they SHIT THEIR PANTS. Even I've never been THAT shwasted! So instead of going to a hotel and smushing this weekend, I'll probaby just be on Squadron/Base lockdown...doing PT and other pointless tasks from 0400 to 1600. On a Saturday. SARC MY LIFE.

Yours Truly,
     Alexa

I'm Alive

Dearest Reader,

     I'm alive and super buff. Okay, so I've lost some muscle definition since basic but whatever. I'm still mega skinny ;) Currently at tech school and I finally start class on Friday. I've been here since May 9th and I've just been cleaning random buildings since then awaiting my class start date. Finally got interwebs in my dorm so now I can finally start updating regularly :D

Okay, it's 2053 and I have to start getting ready for bed. Sext you tomorrow!!

Yours Truly,
     Alexa

I leave in two days...

Dearest Reader,

     As I type, I'm cleaning. I'm worrying. And most of all, I'm contimplating what and who i'll be leaving behind. Packing up my room once again is such a pain and a reminder of who I am and what I've become. I've done some growing, and set new priorities. The next few days and weeks are going to forever change me and I hope it'll be into someone who still has high hopes. I'm getting rid of a bunch of clothes, trinkets, papers, memories. It's going to be fun?
    
     I'm still freaking out. So that first paragraph was nothing but horse shit and me not deleting whatever I started thinking. I'm going to miss Tucson. It's the place I grew up and the only place in the world I consider home in a shit hole. It's the best and worst little town ever. Big enough to not know everyone but small enough to run into people you know all the time. The next time I come back ((the latest)) will be in August. And then it'll only be for 2 weeks. So hopefully I'll see everyone I didn't get to see right before I left.

     I was ready to leave a few months ago. There was no one I would be leaving behind, untill a few weeks ago. It kind of just happened out of nowhere. I wasn't looking for anyone, let alone expecting it to happen. But I think that's how the best romances happen, when you least expect them. I have no expectations for this relationship. I'm just having fun and seeing where it ends up.

I've gotta keep packing, I'll update one last time tomorrow before I leave. CUM TO MY OPEN HAUS!

Yours truly,
     Alexa

Mama Mia...

Dearest Reader,

     I only have...what...19 days? And I'm starting to feel bad because I havent been spending much time with my mother as of late. But at the same time, I'm spending my time with other special people too. So, I'm torn. Guess I should get my priorities straight, huh?

Yours truly,
     Alexa

20 days and counting

Dearest Reader,



Shaved with clippers for easier maitenence.

     The days are zooming past and at an incomperable speed. Just last week, it seems like I was still at 42 days. Since then, I've got my hair cut, planned and coordinated a trip to California and Disneyland, and made peace with the fact that I'll have to leave my son, Jynxie with my mother for atleast 3 years. Due to the fact that I'll only be allowed to live in the dorms and they don't allow animals...Ugh...


Jynx Magoo Ponta Kun Allen-Donithan



     My workout regiment has changed. Not only do I run 3 times a week, I also added a jump rope and medicine ball routine. All that ontop of strength training and practicing my pathetic push ups. But all my efforts have not gone un noticed. I've losst 1/2 an inch off my chest and my arms have thinned out and gained muscle deffinition. Also, I've noticed that my cheek bones are starting to show slightly and my collar bones are becoming more visible. And yet, my actual weight number has not changed. I don't understand how one can develop so much without loosing more than 2-3 pounds. But my motivation is still strong. I don't want to be recycled in basic training and fail my own expectations.

Winter surprise!!

     Along with my workouts, I've stopped drinking, limited my time around those who smoke, and put myself on a new diet. I eat like a king for breakfast, a prince for lunch and a beggar for dinner. I always have one hefty salad in the morning, a lighter one as a snack, soup if its available or half a sandwich. I try to stay away from mayo and use light mustard instead. Grain breads are best if my soy bean bread is not available. Also, substituting dressings for salsa is so much better in taste and caloric intake.

     Also, going to church more has been helping me mentally prepare for basic. Just this last sermon was about Jonah in the whale and how he God was still with him even in his darkest moments. It's the little things like this that bring me back to my roots. Being good, having faith, and remembering my morals. Granted, this last bit was super corny, and probably out of my own character, but it's all part of a new movement I'm trying and it's caleld growing up. I don't want to be stuck in Tucson forever, stuck in my ways, talking to the same people i've known all my life...I want to be out of my comfort zone. New surroundings..to be a new person would be what I'm really doing all this for. I'm done living for myself and for momentary highs...they're all short lived and not what I truly want ie. people, places, things.

     I have high hopes for this new career I'm choosing. Hopefully it will open more doors and serve more opportunities than Art school would have given me. There's still time to improve my work and still time to persue it as a later career, but for now I'm focusing on what's practical for me in now. And for now, missiles will provide more money than paintings and simple doodles. Let's be honest, unless one's work is truly unique, different, and oustanding, the life of an artists is most challenging.

     Speaking of money and working and what-nots...yesterday was my last day working at the retierment home. GOODNESS! It was really hard to leave all those oldie foldies. It really was like working for 150 grandparents. They would shower you with small gifts, terms of endearment, hugs, kisses, cheek pinches, even a few witty insults. But all of it was in the name of love and the fact that I added some kind of positive mark onto someone elses life was good enough for me. I got plenty of congrats from them all once they found out I was leaving to join the service. Some even sang the Air Force song for me, which was really quite adorable. I'll miss them all. The residents and even the other employees. I recieved a card signed by them all and that was very sweet. I played one last prank on my former boss as well...I wrapped her truck in plastic, sprayed chocolate syrup all over it, dumped a trash bag in the bed, and salted ice from the salad bar behind her truck so that way it would freeze as one large clump of ice and be much harder to move. All done in the name of good fun. We had a laugh and that was that. Working at the Cascades was such a joy and quite the experiance. I'll never forget it and hope that most everyone gets the same opportunity.

Yours Truly,

     Alexa

    

So wedding'd out...

GREAT style of dress



Color for my bride's maids dresses AND groomsmen kerchiefs



FOR MY BRIDESMAIDS

1. I want to show off my curves, so my brides maids CAN'T!

2. They need to be mid length. I don't wanna see knee caps!

3. High and straight neckline

4. I don't want to see cleavage

5. No sleeves or shoulders. Think 'inocent' maid

6. PLAIN, PLAIN, PLAIN, COVERAGE

7. White waistline ribbon to off set color

8. WHITE heels. No higher than mine ;)

9. They may  not wear any jewelery other than pearls

10. They must wear their hair down



Purple ribbon



Dog ring bearer

Cute idea? Or is it over done??

My boquet, because I loooove Lillies

Center piece!

1. Mama's dress 

Jacket is removable and strapless

2. Mama's dress

3. Mama's dress

MAMA'S DRESS

1. Just be the same color as my brides maids

2. I'd prefer it to be long, stay classy mama!

3. Shoe's, hair, and jewelery are up to you! 

SO perfect for a beach wedding!!!! Even down to the lights and plants!

And finally....

THE WEDDING DRESS

1. I'd love a sweatheart cut! They accent the bewbiez!

2. I want a beach wedding, so it must be cut accordingly

3. Short to midlength dress

4. Longer in the back? Long train??

Built for the beach

Beach wedding dresses are generally:
1. wrinkle-resistant and able to keep in perfect shape even though you’ll be packing it away in your suitcase.
2. made from lighter fabrics, because you don’t want to be sweating while you’re getting hitched!
3. easier to fold up and pack away, because you’ll be transporting it in your suitcase and don’t need the hassle of finding customized luggage just for your dress.
4. not too long because it can be hard to walk on the sand.
5. a little less formal and simpler in design because you won’t be getting married in a cathedral or other fancy location.

The link

The link

The link

Wedding Cake Wanna Be...

Dearest Reader,

     I'm taking a girlie moment and planning the SHIT out of my one day wedding. I just got back from my cousins bridal shower, so I'm aalll gay for weddings right now. Pardon the mass amounts of gayness. You have been warned.

1. I want a 3 layers/tiers cake. Square. Enough for a small and intimate wedding.
2. Either a Strawberry shortcake or peanut butter and jelly cake! Yumm!!!

3. I want a lace look. Almost like someone just glued a bunch of doilies onto the cake. Pretty and simple!





Again, in deep purple instead of black.



BEAUTIFUL! Only in a deep purple instead of black lace.



Flowers need to be less pasty purple...



My wedding topper must be HILIARIOUS or super kewt! And of course, the bride must be asian. DUH.

I LOOOVE the bunnies!



OMG SUPER KEWT!

My grandmother is in the hospital

Dearest Reader,



L to R: Mailee, JT (cousins), Nanay, Yours Truly


     She went in the hospital on Friday evening and I flew in Saturday morning 6:00am Tucson time, 5:00am Cali time. But previous to that night, I was out watching a few bands at a local venue till about 11:30p, and had to wake up around 4:00am the next morning. Needless to say, I was exhausted yesterday and today and probably tomorrow. I got to the hospital to find my grandmother as so, hooked up to machines, a mask on her face and tubes going every which way. Her breathing was heavy and inconsistant. She was emitted into the hospital for shortness of breath and later found out that her kidneys were at 30-40%.

     There seemed to be no light at the end of this tunnel. She can't eat salt, and her breathing problems are triggered by stress and if there's one thing you must know about my grandmother is that she loves her salt and surrounds herself with stress. It's just who she is. The moment my mom, step dad, and I walked into her room, she just let us have her life story in stress and anguish and then immediatley fell asleep. I was upset that she was crying and talking about her past, but it helped her sleep. I watched her heart rate rise and fall. No fun for me.

     The only thing really okay about this trip was seeing all my family. My cousins are so grown, my aunts and uncle are still humorous and young at heart, my grandfather is still quiet and reserved, but present and in good health. I was so happy to see everyone and be around their happy spirits for the most part. We all shared laughs, caught everyone up on me joining the military, and spent many restless and crampy hours in uncomfortable hospital chairs. Nanay slepft for most of the first day, and was primarily awake for today and actually walked around alittle bit. The common thought was that her irregular breathing was caused by an anxiety attack.

     I spent all day and all night at the hospital and had my first nap today. I went back to Nanay's house and slept in her bed. I thougth it would be comforting...First thing I noticed when I walked into her house was that there were millions of pictures of my two other cousins around the house, a few of me, a few of the rest of the family. No big deal I guess. I went into her room and there were even MORE pictures of my cousins and then NONE of me...okay that kinda sucked but I was okay with it. And then I saw a picture frame that had three spaces and on the bottom of the frame it said Grandkids. And guess whose picture was left out....It's hard to go back and be happy to see someone after some emotional shit like that was just played out. I realize it may seem kind of petty, but you have to understand. It's my grandmother. My dying grandmother. And to know that she doesn't hold me to that high of a standard as my younger cousins, kills me. Especially that I'm the first, and I have to fight for her attention seeing as how I live in another state. We send her pictures, and to no avail...I feel left down and out. Maybe I'm just being selfish.

Yours truly,

     Alexa

    

Westboro Baptist Church

Dearest Reader,

                                           This is EXACTLY what needs to happen more often.


     This church...I take it very personally when I see the attacks this church brings onto other people. And their targets are the homosexual community and the mourning families of fallen soldiers, this is something I will not stand for. Don't like America, and all that we suppor, then get out. I understand that maybe you may not agree with the reasons why we're at war, but always support the troops. They're our boys and young men, who are giving their lives and time for us. Even for those of us that are less than thankful. It just brings me to tears and wrenches my gut to see this church bashing everything I hold dear to my heart.
     The fact that this kult uses religion as...their reasons of harrasment and hatred just kills me. I don't clame to be religious, but I do believe in God. And the first lessons taught and learned about God is that he only has one rule, and thats to love.
LOVE
LOVE
LOVE
LOVE
LOVE THY NEIGHBOR.
It's the only rule you really have to follow, because if you do this, then you automatically follow all the other rules. You wouldn't covet your neighbors wife, because you're inlove with your own. You wouldn't kill someone because you love them. It's the easiest rule to remember, to love one another. This church gives all religions a bad name, mainly all Christians. But in the end, trying to be one of those that follow the love rule, I still fail every time I see this church. I curse, I cry, and I don't see how these people are still....in existant. My heart just hurts over these people...

Yours truly,
     Alexa

Ready, Set, RUN

Dearest Reader,

     Today, I ran for fun. THAT'S RIGHT. I ran an extra lap around my subdivision for FUN. I think this work out stuff is starting to become addictive. I'm noticing that it's putting me in a better mood, my eating habbits are changing DRASTICALLY. I'll have an egg sandwich in the morning, a large chicken salad for lunch, and by the time dinner rolls around, I'll much on some fruits or nuts. I'm staying full longer, and eating less. DEAR GOD THIS EXERCISE STUFF IS WORKING, ALL THANKS TO MS. MINAJ.

Her latest album, Pink Friday, has been such a great running soundtrack for me.

     I'm taking charge of my weight loss and preparing for BMT. Stregth training, running, dieting, all this to be a better Airman and overall, a better person. Aim high and Bleed Blue!

Yours truly,
     Alexa

Human Barricade to Stop the Westboro Baptist Church

Dearest Reader,

     EVENTS:
-ORGANIZATIONAL MEETING: JANUARY 10, 5:30 PM; JOEL D. VALDEZ MAIN LIBRARY, 101 N STONE AVE
-CHRISTINA GREEN'S FUNERAL: JANUARY 13, 1 PM; ST. ELIZABETH ANN SETON, 8560 N SHANNON

------------UPDATE JANUARY 10, 1 PM------------
...
FUNDRAISER!!! We officially have a PHELPS-A-THON where we can raise money for a local anti-violence group right here in Tucson. Spread the word: http://phelps-a-thon.com/arizona/
Let's raise money against the hate these guys are trying to spread!

------------UPDATE JANUARY 10, 2 AM------------

Christina Green's funeral has been stated to be this Thursday, January 13, at 1 PM. It will be at St. Elizabeth Ann Seton, at 8560 North Shannon Road. http://tinypic.com/r/2nq87wh/7

We are currently getting in touch with St. Elizabeth Ann Seton to discuss how we should go about this Thursday. Additionally, we hope to get in touch with the family (or have St. Elizabeth Ann Seton do so) in order to ensure that they know we'll be there, and are alright with us being there.

Additionally, there is an organizational meeting planned for tomorrow (Monday, the 10th) evening at 5:30 PM at the Joel D. Valdez Main Library. The address is 101 N Stone Ave. Thanks to Margaret Still for suggesting the time and venue.

ALSO, PLEASE REMEMBER: EVERYTHING WE DO MUST BE PEACEFUL. WBC MAKES THEIR MONEY BY SUING THOSE WHO BECOME UNRULY TOWARDS THEM. Stay classy, everyone.

Finally, thanks to everybody for the incredible response. This event is so much bigger than anything we expected, and we know that the victims and their families will be far more grateful than we are.

-----------------------------------

The Westboro Baptist Church is going to picket the funerals of the Tucson shooting victims. If you haven't heard of them, look them up to see the kind of hatred they have spread at the funerals of people like soldiers who serve our country. We can't stop them because they have the right to protest under the 1st Amendment. We can, however, make a human barricade to keep them away from the funerals. We don't know when or where any of them are yet, but as soon as we know, we can start planning.

Note: THIS MUST BE PEACEFUL. One way the church makes their money is to provoke people into confrontations and then sue them. DO NOT BE PROVOKED.

As soon as we get specific information about the time and place of the funerals, we will let everyone know.

We shouldn't do anything loud or offensive that would draw attention to us. Remember, we will be at these funerals. We should be there so that the families don't have to see these protests. Even if we are unsuccessful at keeping them away from the funeral or if they end up not showing up, the families will see how many people are there to support them.

**********************************************************************************

The Westboro Baptist Church is known for picketing the funerals of fallen troops, propagating anti-gay hatred, and perpetuating hate towards those of Jewish faith. And now, they are coming to Tucson, AZ.

(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Westboro_Baptist_Church)

In light of the recent tragedy in Tucson, AZ where Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords is still in critical condition, several others injured, and 6 others dead, the Westboro Bap...tist Church has announced their plans to picket the upcoming funerals.

We cannot, as citizens of Arizona, continue to allow our towns, cities, homes, and lives to be inundated with bigotry and hatred. WE MUST TAKE A STAND!

While the dates of these funerals are yet to be announced, we can still rally support and create a coalition geared towards peacefully protesting the Westboro Baptist Church as they invade our city. We MUST take this opportunity to show them the power of kindness, love, and equality. We MUST take a stand not only for ourselves, but also for the innocent lives lost and the families that are trying to cope with such devastating losses.

Yours truly,

     Alexa

Gimmie dat dog!

Cavachon

Pembroke Welsh Corgi

Greyhound

Chorkie

Bulldog

Kishuken

Irish Wolfhound Worlds TALLEST dog

Saluki

Australian Cattle Dog

Gabriel Giffords, my Congresswoman, was shot in the head.

Dearest Reader,

     I don't care where you stand on politics. Lives were taken, people were injured, all for what? Pure disagreement. Don't kill representaties. Come on guys....just....argue. I'm kind of shocked right now, so nothing will make sense. But My prayers go out to her family. Arizona is already considered the bastard child of America right now (SB1070 issue), I have a feeling that 2011 is going to bring a new level of embarrasment for my state. Saints preserve us.

Yours truly,
     Alexa

P.S. Here's a few related links

Link 1
BEST link

Chicago and Jersey Shore

Dearest Reader,

     My best friend in the world, Natalie, moved to Chicago a few days ago and I can't be happier for her. I wrote her a letter telling her I loved her and that I wished the best for her.  I basically gave her the pep talk of a life time ensuring her that I'd always be here whenever she needed me. But I also reminded her that if and when a good opportunity comes around, she should go for it. I of course am reffering to her boyfriend. BUT ENOUGH ABOUT THAT!

     I have a new favorite TV show, and I'm a bit embarrased to admit it. Jersey Shore. It's smut, stupid, but it's SO ENTERTAINING! I can't get enough of the fake tans, horrible accents, and endless nights of partying done on screen. The characters are all excentric, loud, and obnoxious. I can't type too much right now, the first episode of the third season is on! BRB. KBAI.

Yours truly,
     Alexa